哇哇..你是不是我们学校哒.!!我们也4.这个作业凹.~!
硪找勒5则笑话.~:
I'm Trying to Stop It
"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"
"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？”
“没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”
“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes ，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”
TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?
John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.
老师：我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子？
约翰：嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,就看见一个牌子上写着"学校----慢行".
Let me take it down
An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."
"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will tell a flea what I know."
为我所用
一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”
“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
习语:
A good winter brings a good summer.瑞雪兆丰年。 A good tongue is a good weapon.伶俐的口齿是一种锐利的武器。 A good tale is none the worse for being twice told.好故事百听不厌。 A good name keeps lustre in the dark.好的名声在黑暗中也会光芒四射。 A good name is sooner lost than won.美誉难得而易失。 A good name is earlier lost than won.失去美名易，得到美名难。 A good name is better than riches.好名誉胜过有财富。 A good medicine tastes bitter.良药苦口，忠言逆耳。 A friend is best found in adversity.患难见真友。 A friend is a second self.朋友是另一个我。 A friend in need is a friend indeed.患难朋友才是真朋友。 No wisdom like silence智者寡言 Necessity knows no law铤而走险 Many hands make light work人多好办事 Don?t play the goat不要胡闹 They’re a barrel of laughs他们很搞笑 This movie was just a hype这部电影完全是在炒作 the shortest straw下下签 The news came as a bombshell这个消息犹如晴天霹雳 feeling low意气消沉 These are more than old wives? tales这些可不是无稽之谈 That’ll save your skin那可帮你度过难关 Every bad has some good 坏事情也有好的一面 Some things rub them the wrong way他们被惹怒了 Stay put停住不动 to fly off the handle突然生气、发怒 He is really on the ball他真的思路很敏捷 got savoir faire言行得体 He has never rested on his laurels他从不满足目前的成就 Jump down someone’s throat生气地批评 put a roof over one’s head找个地方安顿 faced the music报应 blinded with science无言以对 Off one’s rocker缺乏理智 old goat老古板（通常指年长者） Welcome！It’s lovely to see you欢迎！见到你真高兴！ What’s gotten into you？你怎么了？ Coffee kept them on the go咖啡使他们充满活力； Shine on搁在一旁； Monkey（around）with乱动； I think I get the drift我知道了； get the drift明白，了解 The meeting will start at 10 o?clock sharp会议十点准时开始； like taking candy from a baby形容某事易如反掌 Home is where the heart is家是心之所在 From the word go 从头到尾； They help make it less of a dog?s life他们帮忙改善生活； Half-baked 不成熟的 bend the rules at times网开一面 Spill one’s guts说出实情 For heaven?s sake！老天！表示惊奇或愤怒的感叹语 Fly-by-night不可靠的，不可信任的 Nervous wreck紧张，激动 Pull through脱险，渡过难关 Thumb through 匆匆的阅读 Lose one’s shirt一文不值 Mess around with瞎搞；乱动 Touch and go情势危急 Handwriting on the wall.显而易见的危险 Spread oneself too thin 心力交瘁 run-down筋疲力尽 We look forward to the dawn of better days.我们期待好日子的来临 Variety is charming.丰富多彩就是美 Two of a trade never agree.同行是冤家 The sudden news frightened me.突来的消息吓我一跳 He threatened to fire me他威胁要解雇我 You young devil’s spawn！你这小鬼！ It doesn’t listen right这听起来似乎不对； What snacks do you like best？你最喜欢什么零食； I like raisins and kebabs葡萄干和肉串 pistachio开心果；beef jerky牛肉干儿； sunflower seeds瓜子；fish jerky鱼片。 美语“天啊”-Oh！boy或Oh！man；“好痛呀”美语标准口语是Ouch； 如果身边有喋喋不休的人，可以说“Buzz off” That makes sense那可以理解； You said it你算说对了； I really need to blow off some steam!我得舒缓一下压力； take a piss小便 Pride feels no cold.人要图俏，冻死不叫。/ 骄者不觉冷，俏人不穿棉。 Virtue never grows old. 美德永远不会过时。 Pride feels no cold. 人要图俏，冻死不叫。/ 骄者不觉冷，俏人不穿棉。 I am always punctual 我总是很准时； Don’t be so modest 别谦虚了； I am flattered过奖了 I am on your side 我支持你； Well，it depends噢，这得看情况； It is up in the air悬而未决 That is the latest fashion. 这是最流行的款式； He always talks big. 他总是吹牛。 So far so good 目前为止，一切都好； Let’s get to the point 来谈要点吧！ For the old time sake. 看在旧曰关系的面子上； Let’s forgive and forget. 尽弃前嫌。 Knock it off. 少来这一套；A close call. 太危险了/千钧一发； Neck and neck. 不分上下 It is cool很棒； It is neat太酷了； It is righteous酷毙了! Righteous比较少用 That will be the day. 有这么一天就好了； I am having a swell time. 我玩得很开心 If I were in your shoes…如果我是你的话…； It is out of the question. 这是不可能的 He passed out. 他已经昏倒了！； Not a sound was heard 没有一点声音； Don’t panic. 不要慌！ It is a lot of junks. 这都是一些鬼东西； Over my dead body! 休想！ I decline! 我拒绝 I got a big kick out of it. 这件事真令我开心； Don’t try to brainwash me.别想给我洗脑 Don’t chicken out，Be a man. 不要退缩了； You can count on us. 你可以信赖我们。 His words carry a lot of weight 他的话很有份量； My mouth is watering. 我流口水了 Don’t dream away your time 别虚度光阴； Cheer up振作起来； You are a chicken你是个胆小鬼 It is nothing to be surprised about 这事不值得大惊小怪； What a good deal! 真便宜 In a word，I am tired of everything 总之，我对一切都很厌倦； You asked for it 你自讨苦吃 God helps those who he1p themselves 上帝帮助那些自己帮自己的人； You set me up! 你出卖我 The most difficult thing in life is to know yourself 人贵有自知之明 Misfortune might be a blessing in disguise 塞翁失马，安知非福短篇故事:
“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes ，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”
TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?
John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.
老师：我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子？
约翰：嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。