1、一间精神病医院中，某个病患在写信，护士看到了就很好奇的问他。
护士：你要写给谁啊？
病人：写给我自己啊！
护士：那你都写些什么啊？
病人：你神精病啊！我还没收到怎么知道
A mental hospital, a patient in writing, the nurse saw very curious ask him. Nurse: you to write to who? Patient: to my own!
Nurse: that you write what ah?
Patient: you nervous disease! I haven't received how can anyone know
2、精神病人甲把电话号码本从护士办公室偷回病房。问乙说：”你看我最近完成的这 本小说怎么样”？
乙看了看回答：”不错不错。不过，就是人物多了点儿”。
这时，精神病院的护士进来说：”你们把电话号码本给我放回去！”
The mental patient a telephone number from the nurse's office to steal back to the ward. Ask b say: "you see I recently completed this novel how"?
B looked at the answer: "quite good. However, is that a person many a little".
At this time, the nurse of mental hospital come in to say: "you this give me your phone number to put back!"
3、病人：“我总失眠，有什么办法？”医生：“试试从1数到500。”次日医生询问效果，病人：“太难了，数到200就坚持不住了，喝了杯浓咖啡才数完。”
the patient: "I always insomnia, have what way?" Doctor: "try from 1 number to 500." The next day the doctor ask effect, patient: "too difficult, count to 200 can't hold on, have a cup of strong coffee just several to the end."
4、小乌龟去领结婚证。办事员问乌龟年龄，乌龟说：100。办事员遗憾地说：对不起，按照你们家族规定，你还未成年，不准结婚。
The little turtle to get a marriage license. The clerk asked the tortoise age, the tortoise said: 100. The clerk sorry to say: I'm sorry, according to your family, you still young, provisions are not allowed to get married
5、消防队：哪里着火了？报警人：我家。消防队：我是问在什么地方？报警人：在厨房。消防队：我是说我们怎么去？报警人：你们不是有消防车吗？！
Fire department: where was on fire? Reporter: my house. Fire department: I am to ask in what place? Reporter: in the kitchen. Fire department: I mean how do we go there? Reporter: you are not a fire truck? !!!!!
6、三人买早点。第一个说：一个煎蛋，不要蛋黄。老板就照着煎了一个蛋。 第二个说：一个煎蛋，不要蛋白。老板照做了，有点不耐烦。 轮到第三个，老板吼：你呢？不要什么？ 第三个胆怯地说：我……我的不要蛋壳……
Three people buy breakfast. The first one said: a Fried egg, not the egg yolk. The boss as a Fried egg. The second one said: a Fried egg, don't protein. The boss did, was a bit impatient. Third, the boss's roar loud: what about you? Don't? The third timidly say: I... I don't eggshell...
7、 一天，茄子走在大街，忽然打了一个很大的喷嚏。它抹了把鼻涕生气地说：“可恶！又有人拍集体照了！”
8、樱子跟小强说：“今天考试的时候我踢你一下，你就要给我瞄一下。”到了考试的时候，樱子踢了小强一下，小强便回答：喵！
One day, walking in the street, suddenly eggplant played a big sneezing. It with the nose in anger say: "damn! And others take the group!"
With jack Bauer said: "from the test today I play you once, when you will give me a scan." The examination of the time, from the small strong once, small strong play will answer: meow!!!!!
9、小丽：爸爸，发药的阿姨为什么戴口罩？
爸爸：给你的药很好吃，院长怕她们偷吃了。
小丽：给那些拿刀的叔叔戴口罩是怕他们聚餐吧？
Xiaoli: dad, hair why does the aunt of the medicine wear a face mask?
Dad: give your medicine is very delicious, dean afraid they steal to eat.
Xiaoli: to those who drew the sword is afraid of their uncle wear a face mask dinner?
10、大黑熊将一个蜂窝放到水里，想把蜂窝里的蜜蜂泡出来，谁知蜂群出来后，就追的黑熊满世界跑，熊太太见状大骂:“就你那个笨熊样，还敢泡小蜜？”
The big black bear will a honeycomb into water, wants the cellular bees in the bubble out, but after coming out, will chase swarm the black bear world run, the bear wife looked at to lambaste: "will you bear the stupid sample, still dare to bubble small honey?"