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英语笑话要翻译中长类型的?拜托各位了 3Q

St Peters question 圣彼德的问题 Three men, a doctor, an accountant and a lawyer are dead and they appear in front of St Peter. St Peter tells them that they have to answer one question in order to get to Heaven. He looks at the doctor and asks, "There was a movie that was made about a ship that sank after hitting an iceberg, what was its name?" The doctor answers, "The Titanic" and he is sent through. He then looks at the accountant and say, "How many people died in that ship?" Fortunately the accountant had just watched the movie and he answers, "1 500!". St Peter sends him through and then finally turns to the lawyer and commands, in a very heavy voice, "Name them!". 有三个人死了,分别是一名医生、一名会计和一名律师。他们来到了圣彼德面前。圣彼德对他们说,如果他们想进入天堂,就得每人回答一个问题。圣彼德看着医生开始发问,“以前电影院放过一部电影,说的是一艘船撞击冰山后沉没,电影的名字是什么?” 医生回答,“<<泰坦尼克号>>”,医生随即被允许进入天堂。然后圣彼德看着会计说,“船上有多少人遇难?”。会计很走运,因为他刚看过这部电影,回答道,“1500人遇难。”圣彼德把会计也放进天堂了。最后,圣彼德转过身,看着律师,非常严肃地用命令的口吻问道,“把1500人的名字都说出来?” Napoleon was ill Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year. "He's a good boy," said Jack's father, "and if you let him pass this time, I'm sure he'll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well." "No, no, that's quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn't know!" "Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack's father. "You see, I'm afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill." 拿破仑病了 杰克到一所大学去学历史。第一学期结束时,历史课教授没让他及格,校让他退学。然而,杰克的父亲决定去见教授,强烈要求让杰克继续来年的学业。 “他是个好孩子,”杰克的父亲说,“您要是让他这次及格,我相信他明年会有很大进步,学期结束时,他一定会考好的。” “不,不,那不可能,”教授马上回答,“你知道吗?上个月我问他拿破仑什么时候死的,他都不知道。” “先生,请再给他一次机会吧。”杰克的父亲说,“你不知道,恐怕是因为我们家没有订报纸,我们家的人连拿破仑病了都不知道。”